Elemental Histories
by Anita
Summary: They aren't strangers. They aren't friends. But history knows better.


Elemental Histories

The overcast sky was reflected in the endless ocean. Sawyer watched the waters for what seemed like an eternity, searching for any possible signs of life. It had been months, and he never found anything, but it never stopped him from looking.

Cradling his can of beer, he found himself unable to sit back in his chair (68D, he could just barely make out the inscription on the armrest) the way he had so many times before in the past. He struggled to settle back into the normalcy that had once presided over the beach. It was strange to look back now and realize that what they had all had before was normalcy. But they had carved their own niche here on the island. For a while, things had been decent. People had been content. But he could tell something had changed. Nothing had been the same since he'd come back.

Eko was dead, though no one liked to talk about it. He was another name to add to the list of the long-gone. Sawyer hadn't known Eko very well, (the man had scared him shitless when they had first met) but it had been a loss nonetheless. Sometimes, Sawyer wondered if he would be better off if he were in Eko's place. Death seemed like a sweet deliverance.

He just wanted to get the hell off this goddamn island. Away from crying babies, away from old married couples, away from crazed pre-cognitive lunatics. He was getting tired of pretending that things were fine. Every second he was on the island was driving him insane.

Sawyer continued to survey the beach, finding Sun walking towards him.

He had to admit that he never disliked Sun. She had her own share of problems, and she kept them to herself. She never felt it her prerogative to barge into his life. In fact, Sawyer thought astutely, he and Sun had a sort of strange, unspoken camaraderie. He cringed inwardly as he recalled the con he had set up, and how Sun had been hurt in the process. He had regretted it, but Sun was well liked on the island, and he needed to get his point across. She didn't need to know what ultimately didn't concern her.

Sun took determined steps towards Sawyer's spot on the beach. She had always been somewhat unsure about him. Jin had often been very vocal about his feelings on the man. Initially, Jin, like everyone else on the island, had hated Sawyer for everything he was worth, but since their escapade on the raft, Jin had found a new sense of respect for Sawyer.

Sun had never voiced her opinions on Sawyer. She wasn't sure if she had any.

"I told them not to touch your things, to leave everything the way it was..." Sun shook her head at the mess in Sawyer's tent and gave him a small smile. "I'm sorry that they didn't listen."

Sawyer grinned. "It's alright, Little Miss Sunshine. I needed to do some spring cleaning anyway."

"I need something for the nausea." she asked, sheepishly, but with a twist of pride.

Sawyer scoffed. "What about all of your little herbs? Voodoo not working anymore?"

She sighed and took a seat next to him. "The weather hasn't been very good lately. The garden's not doing too well."

"So you're coming to me? What, am I the new Doc in town or something?"

Sun's eyes shot up in shock as Sawyer cursed under his breath. He didn't mean to always be such a jerk. Sometimes it was just a second nature for him.

"Sorry." Sawyer muttered.

Sun shook her head and smiled weakly, somehow managing to alleviate the tension. Sawyer tossed her a bottle of pills.

"This should do the trick."

"Thanks."

Sawyer watched as she toyed with the bottle in her hands, but made no move to take the pills, and made no move to leave.

"You nervous? About the pregnancy, I mean." He wasn't sure how exactly he expected her to feel. He knew she was happy, and Jin was happy, but the circumstances were all wrong.

Sun shook her head, lost in thought. "I'm not nervous. Not **too** nervous. I'm fine, I guess. At least I know I'm not the first one here to go through it. Claire had Aaron here on the island, and things turned out just fine for her."

Sawyer recalled that, in fact, Claire had been kidnapped and had been missing for weeks, but even he knew not to bring that memory back up.

Sun turned to him, suddenly. "Did you, I mean, do you have any children?" She immediately regretted asking. She had never expected Sawyer to reveal anything about his past life to her. It wasn't a topic they had ever broached before, and she knew they both felt it was better that way.

"Kids?" His voice was raw, quiet.

Sun watched him, expectantly, hoping for him to say something, anything, to break the silence she had caused.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to –" Sun started, but stopped, seeing the darkened look on Sawyer's face. She stood up, reluctantly and began to leave.

"Clementine." He spoke, stopping her. He was wearing a scowl upon his face, but Sun could hear a lighter tone in his voice.

"Her name was Clementine. But you shouldn't come running to me for parenting advice. I wasn't gunning for father of the year. Heck, I don't even know how old she would be right now…" Sawyer spat out.

Sun felt guilty for causing his painful memories to resurface. There was already so much going on around the island; Sawyer didn't need anymore troubling thoughts.

They all had pasts they weren't proud of. She realized that she was in no position to judge.

So she simply nodded her head. "Thank you for the medicine."

Sawyer grimaced. "You're welcome."

Sun watched as his gaze returned to the surrounding waters. She willed herself to leave, to return to Jin and assure him that her nausea would get better, but she found her feet were rooted in the sand.

"I've seen the way you handle Aaron, Sun. You'll be a fine mom…"

His eyes had returned to her face, and she realized she had been holding her breath. Maybe this was what she had come for, reassurance. She knew that this was the most he could give her.

"Thank you, Sawyer." She hoped he realized how much she meant it.

Sawyer looked at the bottle in Sun's hands. "Just make sure you can get yourself through the pregnancy first."

They shared a small smile before they wordlessly went their separate ways.

And Sawyer watched as the waves continued to crash endlessly along the shore.


End file.
